In conflict, do you set out intentionally trying to hurt or tick off your partner? Not saying that this doesn’t occur as the end result, but is it your intent? If you are working on creating a happy partnership, then most often the answer is no. So, if this is true for you, why would it not be true for your partner? Give your partner the benefit of the doubt.
Making assumptions, thinking our partners are intentionally screwing us over is only going to cause sadness and anger. Instead of being ticked off when they walk through the door, ask what happened, why things occurred the way they did. If we do this in a soft curious manner, rather than an angry attacking mode, the cycle changes.
Or, in other situations, (say for example your partner is late) just give your partner the benefit of the doubt, maybe they had a terrible day and just forgot to call. Maybe someone needed help and your partner being the kind sole they are chose to help them. Maybe they lost their watch or just genuinely forgot. It doesn’t mean they don’t care about you. Your partner is human just like you, give them the benefit of the doubt. Don’t ruin the whole evening over this, don’t let it stew inside of you. Things happen. If we let it go, don’t hold on to it, we are able to have a better time and connect more effectively.
